Week 33

Well folks, I might just squeak this in before midnight, which means that it will have gone up on Saturday, which is pretty darn close to on time, so I’m going to call that a victory.

We are on day 1 of our 2016 road trip extravaganza! Two weeks of driving through (mostly) Northern Ontario and a combination of camping in the Canadian shield and visiting family and friends. For those who are wondering: yes, I brought my pregnancy body pillow, but I won’t have a report on how it works for sleeping in the tent until after tomorrow night, so you’ll just have to wait for the week 34 update to find out how that went.

So, as it’s a bit early for reports on our road trip (which can currently be summed up as, we came, we saw, we ate food, we swam, we went to bed) I’ll just get you caught up on how the past week has been.

I have been struggling to get as much work done as I need to with the amount of energy I have in a day. It’s not as bad as it was back in yonder days of the first trimester, when just getting up and starting my day was enough of a drain that it required an immediate nap. But, napping is becoming a daily activity again, and I’m low on energy for the rest of the day if I miss out. And, with the amount of work I have, and the deadlines I’m currently working with (one self imposed, the other on contract) I need more hours in a day when I can be productive. But, I’m making it work for now, and hoping I can keep it going through the end of August.

Meanwhile, in the land of Speck: we had a midwife appointment on Wednesday, and Corey came too, because it was the appointment where we got the lowdown on all the details of giving birth in the birth center, and what that means compared to a hospital birth or home birth etc. Corey was just as drawn in by how beautiful the birth center is as I was, and our current plan A is that we will be birthing there. 

Of course we also had a normal midwife appointment as well, and Speck is doing well, seems to be head down (yay! fingers crossed that remains true), had a heartbeat of 135 (which is Speck’s normal), and my fundal height is 32 centimeters, so right on track. My blood pressure was normal (although a bit high for me, but I attribute that to the excitement of the appointment in which we get to hear all about giving birth in the birth center… also known as, SHIT GETTING REAL). As we were driving home from that appointment Corey said, “so, have you considered the possibility that you could go into early labor on this trip?” (Referring to our road trip.) 

Yep. Sure have. But I’m not about to keep us from having a nice vacation just on the off chance Speck decides to show up early. 

It continues to be difficult to get comfortable, sitting down in chairs that aren’t completely upright makes me feel like my stomach is inside my lungs and breathing and eating seem like activities that take up too much space. Walking still feels really good, and laying down is a close second. Sitting on my exercise ball feels awesome. I briefly considered trying to crush it into the car in order to bring it with us on this trip. Then I realized that was idiotic. Still, I thought about it.

Swimming feels great  and I was happy to do some more today, and looking forward to swimming again tomorrow. Yay swimming. All the swimming. So much swimming. May we swim every day for the next two weeks! 

Speck moves around a lot on any given day and seems to be working hard to drive elbows and knees into all the nooks and crannies of my uterus. I’m not sure how exciting that world is to explore, but Speck seems to be leaving no stone unturned. A+ for your sense of adventure Speck, now please kindly remove your hand from my cervix. Thank you. 

I get out of breath at the weirdest times. Standing up from the couch, for example, winds me terribly. While swimming for 750 meters or running 2km does nothing of the kind. Pregnancy is weird. 

Well, driving for 4 hours after not sleeping particularly well last night seems to be finally catching up with me, and my eyes are fluttering shut as I write this, so I think this is where I will leave you. Corey and I haven’t managed to squeeze in a bump shot yet, but I’ll try to get some pics of me in my pregnant bikini clad glory over the next few days to post in next week’s entry. For now I leave you with my Wednesday bump shot. 

Oh and PS. HICCOUGHS. All the damned time. Speck is a hiccough machine. Kinda cute. ;-)

Week 32

Ok. So, Monday. That's one day earlier than last week. A nice careful progression towards actually posting on Friday or Saturday again, right? Right.

Right.

Well, week 32 was busy and full of non-pregnancy related importance but I'll try to focus on the pregnancy related bits.

And week 33 is already so busy that I really only have time to do bullet points for this post. So here goes...

• Corey and I had our anniversary last weekend and enjoyed a nice meal to mark five years of marriage and eight years of being together. The only downside was not having a nice beer to go with the meal. Le sigh... 
• Despite how busy I've been with work endeavors I have managed to get plenty of walking in, along with a bit of running, swimming and hiking. This makes me feel pretty good. And, to make my walking go a bit farther I've downloaded an app that makes donations to an animal shelter of your choice just for walking your dog (or walking without a dog). I selected the no kill shelter where I adopted Artemis and this makes me happy. (Now all I have to do is remember to turn the damned thing on before I walk the dog. I'm currently batting about 500 in that regard. Freakin' pregnancy brain.) 
• The swimming is so good that I feel it deserves its own bullet point. I once more went to a nearby manmade lake that is about 750 meters long and swam the length of it. It felt damned good, and this time I remembered to bring my goggles so I actually swam freestyle for most of it (mixed with breast stroke for sighting) and it was glorious. I would do that every day if I could. (And if I were willing to bike the 30km each way to get there and back and I could do that... and prepregnancy me would have enjoyed that bike ride but now... I'm not so sure.) Anyway, it's a nice treat when I can get there. 
• Despite all that exercise, I still feel like I'm getting... fluffy. I miss having distinctive arm muscles, and I miss being able to do pull ups... Still, I'm pretty happy with my overall fitness level, and grateful for the amount of physical activity I can still manage. Fingers crossed I can keep it up all the way until Speck's arrival. 
• This past week marks the first time I've really used pregnancy as an excuse to not do things I would normally do. For one, I didn't bother dressing up to go to a medieval fair even though I have the costuming for it. The thought of trying on yet more of my old clothes and not having them fit was too sad, and besides, it was hot with a possibility of rain in the future and I thought, eh, fuck it. Episode two of this was parking in a paid parking lot with a minimum two hour payment and not paying because a. I was only going to be there for 15 minutes and it was the middle of the night anyway and b. I'm pregnant, fuck you people, it's 11pm and I don't feel like tripling the distance of my walk just because you have a parking monopoly. (Hormones may or may not have entered into that last one.) 
• Corey went on a crib buying spree last week. He bought two cribs (used) one of which he returned, and we now have a crib. Holy shit. We have a crib. Which is where babies sleep. We are having a baby. Holy shit! How did this happen?!? 
• I'm pretty sure I'm forgetting stuff, but that's all I remember at the moment, and I have a ton of work to get done as well as house guest, so I really need to get going. I'll leave you with a bump picture of course (this one actually taken by Corey) and will endeavor to include all that I've missed in the week 33 blog. This pregnancy is flying by now. Speck will be here in no time. That is both exciting and pants shitting. 

Bonus dog who didn't feel like getting out of the shot. Also, hurray pre-preggo pants that still fit (granted they were huge before pregnancy and strictly purchased as working outside pants, but whatever, I'll take it)!

Week 31

Welcome to the week 31 post, yes, a few days late, but really just under a week after the last post went up, so I hope you'll excuse it...

Let's start with last week's midwife appointment, shall we?

The appointment went pretty well. My midwife and I talked about music for a good 20 minutes and then got down to the business of checking on Speck.

Speck's heart rate was 130 which, as you'll know if you have an excellent memory for numbers mentioned in previous posts, is just about the same as it always is, so that's good.

My fundal height was at 30cm which is exactly right for being between week 30 and week 31 (my appointment was last Wednesday). So yay! My uterus is the appropriate size. Huzzah! (Really this isn't that big a deal, but it's a good guideline that things are continuing as they should.)

Speck was moving lots and totally batting at the doppler wand and the midwife's hands. Speck is moving lots in general, and that's good news too. Basically, all is well with Speck.

My blood pressure was 90/60 which is still in the normal range, but is the low end of the normal range bordering on not normal. At least we don't have to worry about me having hypertension. Keep in mind my blood pressure is generally pretty low (the beginning of this pregnancy marked some of the highest BP I've ever registered) but I can't remember ever getting anything as low as 90/60 before. My midwife was not at all concerned, but I wonder if low bp is part of why I've been feeling so sluggish lately.

My midwife drew blood just to check out all my levels (which hand't been checked since the first trimester) and I already have results back and everything checks out in the normal range. However, my iron is on the low end of normal, so she suggested adjusting my diet to incorporate more iron and to be wary of eating foods that will inhibit iron absorption in the same meal as the iron heavy foods. So, you know, no big deal, but something to monitor.

And now, I would like to take a moment to appreciate the woman who draws blood at the lab that I usually go to. She is a master of blood drawing. Having your blood drawn by her is a complete non-event. You sit down, she preps you, you look away for a second and when you turn back she has filled five vials with blood and slapped a bandaid on you and you wonder when she managed to do all that. Not so my midwife. Of course, it is understandable that she wouldn't be as accomplished at it, her job, after all, is to do many things related to prenatal health and only one of those is taking blood. She probably only takes blood a handful of times a week, if that. Meanwhile, the lady at the lab probably takes blood close to 50 times a day, maybe more. She's really fast. I bet she could fit in even more than that. I don't really know, but... Anyway, I understand why there's a difference... but I didn't really appreciate that difference until my midwife spent a minute and a half prodding around in my arm trying to find my vein after stabbing it for the second time and claiming it rolled away. It was only weird and uncomfortable until she pulled the needle out and then it was suddenly (but briefly) painful, and then it bruised for a few days. It wasn't a big deal, but it made miss my lab tech.

So thank you, wherever you are, lovely lab tech who generally takes my blood, you are wonderful and deserve serious accolades for being good at your job. You probably do other things too, but I appreciate your mastery at blood removal. It is awesome and I now miss it.

Ok. Right. Probably no one cares about that but me, but it was a downside I didn't expect. (Though weighed against the convenience of the midwife doing stuff in house and still getting results back super fast it might be a wash.)

Meanwhile, the day after my midwife appointment I met a pregnant friend and we went to get Oh Doughnuts again. This was my second time to this wonderful land of magic, kittens, unicorns, sugar, and the short road to diabetes. However, you will be happy to know that I branched out and didn't simply get a repeat of the two wonderful flavors I tried last time. (Though to be fair I totally would have gotten the lemon merengue again, but it wasn't in the flavor rotation for the day.) So, I ventured into two new flavors and the results were mixed. I tried the French Toast doughnut and the Raspberry Curd doughnut and had mixed experiences with both. The french toast had an absolutely fabulous frosting, but the filling was a "vegan cinnamon cream" which had a perfectly acceptable flavor, but the texture was that of custard that had congealed. My guess is that the vegan custard served hot is still a good texture but once it has had a chance to cool all bets are off. Still, the overall texture of the doughnut (which was soft, chewy, and delightful) combined with the texture and flavor of the icing, made the overall experience quite pleasant despite the dubious texture of the filling. Meanwhile, the raspberry curd itself was fantastic, a smooth tangy curd that was the exact right texture for my palate but, sadly, it was wrapped in a perfectly plain doughnut covered in granulated sugar that was... fine but nothing special. So, in Virginia's ideal world, these two doughnuts would actually be combined, into something called raspberry french toast. That would totally rock my socks off.

Hmm... that somehow turned into a detailed doughnut review. Weird. The good news is, if you live in Winnipeg you can go check out the fabulous selection at Oh Doughnuts yourself and then you don't have to listen to me ramble on and on about it.

Ahem.

Next topic! So, I mentioned that Speck is moving a lot these days, and yet for a while every time I would want to show Corey the crazy spectacle that is my abdomen looking like a scene from Alien just before things get gory, Speck would stop moving as soon as I called Corey's attention to it. Well, the other night (maybe Thursday night? I can't quite recall) Corey finally got to see the shark circling my belly button. I have yet to successfully capture video of it, but Corey and I got to lay on the couch and be mesmerized by Speck looking as though s/he was trying to break on through to the other side. Which was a. cool, because it's always neat to watch, b. vindicating, because it felt like Speck had been gas-lighting me and Corey thought I was nutzo, and c. fun family time!

In completely unrelated news, I kind of got to use my budding hypnobirthing skills the other day because... *warning TMI coming up* I had a sudden need to poop and when I sat down to get to business it was suddenly really painful, but then I thought, "Fuck you, pain! Relax and breathe, body!" and lo and behold, my body relaxed, the pain went away completely and everything was just fine.

I found this incredibly reassuring, because it was a solid example of mind over matter which is all that hypnobirthing is. And, I know that birth is going to be quite a different level from "painful bowel movement" but, I've actually heard a number of women describe it as "the biggest, most painful shit of your life." So, I am taking this episode as a good sign that hypnobirthing will help me get through labor in a calm and positive fashion. Yay confidence boost!

And finally, on Saturday, Corey and I swung by a local used children's stuff store and then promptly ran away vowing never to return if at all possible. I, for some reason, thought that a consignment kids place might be less overwhelming than a "baby store" but I was completely wrong. The place was jam packed with stuff, there was barely space to turn around, and after we quickly ascertained that they didn't have any cloth diapering supplies, we shuffled awkwardly to the nearest place where turning around was possible, then tucked tail, and ran.

Apparently being 31 weeks pregnant has done absolutely nothing to change my hatred of baby clothes. Oh well. Luckily, it seems that my sister in law is sending some stuff our way, so hopefully I'll be able to put off buying any myself for a while longer.

And I think that covers it for this week. I'll try to post next week's blog by Monday at the latest, but I might even post it on Friday or Saturday if I have time. We shall see.

Here's this week's bump pic (Corey is failing at his job as bump photographer so it's another selfie for you). And, as a bonus, below the bump pic is an awesome wild flower I saw on my dog walk yesterday.

Week 30

Well, this post is late, but then, I warned that it would be in last week's post. After all, I was fairly certain that volunteering for the Winnipeg Folk Festival combined with hosting my wonderful cousin for the weekend would ultimately result in not having time to blog. (Though to be fair to my cousin, volunteering alone would have led to me not having time to blog over the weekend.)

Yesterday was spent recovering from the Folk Festival and today... well, today was spent trying to express in the written word why the Black Lives Matter movement is important. After writing that fairly lengthy blog post, I didn't have the energy to get this one written and up by the end of the day. So, it will ultimately be past midnight by the time I finish this, and I may delay posting it until tomorrow (Wednesday) just to avoid the middle of the night death knell that results in posting something when the rest of the world is asleep.

So, a recap of week 30 (possibly squeaking into week 31 because Folk Fest went from Thursday to Sunday and leaving parts of it out to cover next week just seems silly)...

Well, I know we usually save the bump photos for later, but Corey took last week's bump picture after I'd posted last week's blog entry, so we'll go ahead and start with that. This was taken last Monday:

The angle is a bit weird because Corey was standing in a different location than usual (closer than he usually stands and thus had to angle the camera in order to get me fully in the shot) but BONUS: Artemis decided to stick her adorable mug in the shot. You're welcome. ;-)

So, Monday was the day after we returned from our adventures four hours north of Winnipeg in a land of no internet (blissful if you ask me), enough mosquitos to fell a moose (substantially less on the blissful side of things), and three hours of tubing down a slow shallow river with assorted beverages and good company (back to blissful since I stocked virgin mojitos and managed to only lightly sunburn the bump rather than full-on extra-crispy myself). In other words it was overall a good time and while I found sleeping in a bed that is not the one I'm used to far less comfortable than usual (once upon a time I could sleep anywhere without complaint) I enjoyed getting away from the city for a few days. 

We returned home Sunday evening, and I spent that evening and the following Monday promoting the end of a four day sale on my book and compulsively checking sales stats and rankings. Tuesday was largely spent updating my Patreon campaign with new chapters of my Victoria Marmot webserial, as well as dealing with the tail end of the aforementioned sale. Wednesday was spent in a frenzy of cleaning in preparation for the arrival of my cousin and then spent hanging out with said cousin. 

Thursday through Sunday were spent attending/volunteering at the Winnipeg Folk Festival. So, here's where things get a little crazy. Folk Fest is pretty tiring even when I'm not pregnant. This is my third year volunteering and between spending all day in the sun, being on my feet for each of my 10 hour shifts (only two of those- so not terrible), and not getting home in time to get enough sleep before getting up to do it all again the next day, I find the weekend wonderful but exhausting. This year I added extra sleep deprivation due to pregnancy discomfort to the mix, just for funsies, and the result was a slight reduction in my overall enjoyment of the festival. I was a fair bit grumpier by the end of the weekend than I would usually be, and quite a bit less willing to stay past the end of my shift than I normally would have been. (Most of which would normally be soothed by a beer or two at the end of the night, but that wasn't really an option this time around...)

Still, I had some wonderful moments of enjoying music, spending time with friends, and meeting some favorite musicians to make the weekend overall a lovely experience, plus I got to share the whole thing with my cousin, which was truly lovely. Speck also seemed to enjoy the music, and took quite a few opportunities to 'dance.' Seriously, Speck was moving rhythmically to the music from what I could tell, but I'm willing to admit it might have just been my perception of the movement. 

Ok. So all of that was basically just a long way of saying being pregnant made me grumpier and less tolerant of shenanigans over the weekend, but I still managed to have enough energy for all of the running around I did including the day where, according to the pedometer in my phone, I walked over 15km (that's over 9 miles) in the course of the day. And, oddity of oddities, aside from having sore feet at the end of my 10 hour shifts (spent entirely standing and walking) I felt much better all weekend for all the walking I did than I have on weekends when I've been more sedentary. Walking and staying busy is still making me feel way better than not doing so, and that makes me happy.

So yay for still having energy so far in the third trimester! Of course, the follow up to that is that yesterday, after sleeping for eight hours and then taking my cousin to the airport in the afternoon, I came home and slept for another two hours, and then slept for another eight hours last night. 

Today, I didn't have a nap, but I did manage to eat more than half of an extra large pizza this afternoon. 

And I would be remiss if I didn't mention that over the past few weeks I have felt a lot of strange sluggishness and difficulty catching my breath when sitting in a chair or reclined on the couch. Luckily, lying flat still feels good, as does sitting on the exercise ball, as does standing up and/or walking... but resting is getting hard to do without getting fully horizontal.

Running was on hold during family visit/Folk Fest time, but I hope to start up again this week if the weather decides to cooperate (and maybe even if it doesn't). 

I'm struggling to jump to paragraphs with any sort of reasonable segue at this point (so much so that I gave up last night and decided to finish this today- Wednesday) so I'm just going to say fuck it and start the next paragraph without any introduction, and probably all subsequent paragraphs as well. Please forgive my seeming non sequiturs. 

So lately Speck has been moving a ton more than in the second trimester. Instead of being active for 30 minutes a couple of times a day (and particularly at night) I can now feel Speck move a bit a few times an hour or more. Which leads to constant reminders that Speck is there, and also to me learning more about Speck's personality, especially as Speck seems to react to certain stimuli outside the womb. For example, Speck totally seemed to be dancing during parts of folk fest, which seems about right considering Speck's parentage. Also, Speck pushes back at anything that prods her/him, such as doppler wands and midwife hands that are trying to assess how Speck is doing. All of this gives me small insights into what Speck's personality might be, and it makes this whole creating a new human things seem more real than it ever has. This has led to two very mixed emotions on my part:

1. Speck is totally a person in my mind who I already care about quite a bit and talk to periodically and... if anything were to happen to Speck I would be completely devastated. I have definitely bonded with this kiddo already.

2. HOLY FUCKING SHITBALLS WE MADE A NEW PERSON THAT WE'RE GOING TO MEET IN 9.5 WEEKS!!!!!! I AM SO NOT READY TO BE A PARENT. HOLY SHIT, HOLY SHIT, HOLY SHIT WHAT HAVE WE GOTTEN OURSELVES INTO!?!?!?!?!?

Ahem. In other words, I'm torn between already feeling pretty attached to Speck and feeling like I might have ruined my own life, and nothing will ever be the same.

Now don't worry. Feeling number one trumps feeling number two for most moments of any given day, but I just want to make it clear that even this far along I am still feeling major moments of doubt and concern. I have decided that this is perfectly fine because a. I'm not spiraling into a pool of negative thinking, I'm just having brief moments of "oh holy crap!" and b. I don't think I'm alone in this. So, don't worry you don't have to write in with your sunshine and unicorns and tell me that "having a baby is something you'll never regret," yadda yadda. I get it. Intellectually, I understand, and I even have moments of thinking how cool this is rather than wondering what kind of drugs we were taking that made us think it was a good idea, so I think it'll all be fine. But read the fine print at the top of this blog again: there will be HONESTY. So there you have it. If I'm 100% honest, which I'm a fan of, I admit to still having moments of severe doubt. They tend to be brief, but they are totally there and I am willing to admit to them.

Mostly though, I think this is just going to be the next big adventure and probably a pretty cool one for the most part. 

To that end, I had a moment when my cousin was visiting where I for some reason got excited about cloth diapering supplies and I decided to go through the stuff that I bought at the sale a while back. Turns out we got a pretty good cloth diaper stash and when I went through it I may or may not have practiced folding a "pre-fold" diaper to fit a baby. My cousin wanted to take a picture me doing so, but I wouldn't let her. Shh.... don't tell anyone. I have a rep to keep. 

And in the final bit of randomness this week I've realized that it's time to buy some shit. I have made a list of the things we'll actually need for Speck's arrival and it's about time to pick some of that up so that we're not adding that to the shit we have to do when Speck is already here and we're just trying to stay above water with sleep deprivation and "Holy shit, did I just kill the baby? I think I killed the baby. Is it breathing? I didn't even touch it. How did it die?" *baby cries* "Oh thank, Gwen! The baby is still alive."

So we will be heading out to the local gently used baby items store sometime soonish to get a few items, or at least to start pricing things out. 

And I think that's it for this week. Chances are good that the week 31 post will happen on Saturday or Sunday, since Friday is probably a little too soon after this one.

Here is this week's bumpie, taken on Monday (and a bonus front facing shot just 'cause):

Week 29

Well, this week you get another slightly early blog post, this time because I'm going to be gone all weekend and figured if I didn't write everything down now, you wouldn't hear from me until Monday or Tuesday. And considering how busy NEXT week is supposed to be... well I don't know but it's possible two whole weeks of pregnancy blog would go missing, and we can't have that!

So, here we are, week 29 almost wrapped up in a pretty bow, and week 30 about to start. Holy crap, where has the time gone? Speck will be here in 11 weeks!! (Well, 9 to 13 weeks really, but damn people, that's crazy!)

I have a feeling most of the third trimester is going to fly by, especially because we have a seriously busy summer schedule. Then I expect the last couple weeks before Speck arrives will drag by in the way that only a combination of impatience to meet a new human and the discomfort of feeling like a bloated and rotting whale corpse can account for. At least, that's what I've read. We shall see.

Meanwhile. Let's stick to the present. Enjoy the hell out of the now people, it's the only thing we can be sure of. So, what things do I need to tell you about week 29? Let's see first up, some good stuff.

I RAN 4 out of the past 7 days! And I may yet go for another run today too. Now, keep in mind when I say run here, I mean super slow running around a simple grass field, and the only thing that keeps it from being jogging is my posture and stride. In fact, just to make sure that I don't jog, I'm taking my shoes off and running barefoot around this field. The idea being that running barefoot will keep my weight forward, keep me on the balls of my feet and keep me from doing the up and down bouncing involved in jogging. And why would I want to avoid jogging you ask? Well, aside from the fact that it's supposed to be worse for your whole body and especially your joints, it also causes Speck to put WAAAAYYYY too much pressure on my bladder. So a running stride, even if slowed to a practical crawl, is vastly preferable to me. So there you go. RUNNING! Slow and only for between 1 to 1.5 miles at the moment, but still. Running. It feels so good to run again at all, I will take it. And, as I'm sneaking it into the middle of my 4km dog walk, I am sure to get a decent warm up and cool down each time. Ok. I've probably gone on about this way longer than most people are interested in, I'm just so happy about it that I can't stop telling people. It's like regaining a tiny piece of pre-pregnant me and it feels really good.

Moving on.

Acquisitions! Well, I have been avoiding buying many baby things, as I may have mentioned, but I have received one awesome gift from my mom which I will talk about in a second, and yesterday I bought some pregnancy things. The pregnancy things yesterday were no big deal, just some more athletic pants I can run in that aren't too hot, and an exercise ball for posture, baby positioning, and labor. My doula informs me that sitting on a exercise ball in the last trimester can help ensure Speck is in the right place come b-day, and I am all for that. Plus they're supposed to be damned handy things to have in labor (so much so that the birth center has a whole stack of them just waiting for use) and I hope to labor at home for as long as possible before heading to either the birth center or the hospital, so it'll be nice to have one here. Not to mention it's a nice comfortable alternative to my standing desk that still allows me to work at a pleasant angle relative to my computer but doesn't require me to sit in a chair for hours on end (something my preggo body is decidedly against). I've only had it for a day so far, but my verdict is (as I sit on it to type this blog entry) that if you have a desk job, are pregnant, and have become increasingly uncomfortable in your chair, this might be the solution for you. Might not be though. Keep in mind there's no back support, you have to do that part yourself (which is good for you, helps maintain posture and make your back stronger etc.... unless your back is already messed up, in which case it might not be good for you, please consult your doctor, don't take my random ass anecdotal evidence as science).

This was the best I could do for a selfie that included the exercise ball. It's the grey blob in the middle there. But this is totally me right now. Rocking the ball and working at my laptop. 

Here's a shot demonstrating what a nice height the laptop is for my neck and arms. Well, it sort of demonstrates that... mostly it demonstrates how messy my work space is. Hi, Mom! ;-)

So anyway, that was the main pregnancy related thing I got. The other things were just big, flowy, light colored, long sleeved shirts to wear while being out in the sun all day and needing perhaps more coverage than mere sunscreen can provide. Not to mention, providing a bit of extra mosquito protection as I am reluctant to use DEET products while carrying Speck. So, if a thin flowy shirt will help reduce the amount of mosquito repellent I need to use, I will happily wear one. 

The REALLY AWESOME THING that my mom got me as a gift (despite my protest that gifts, and new things are not really what we're doing this pregnancy--but she's allowed to ignore me on this because she's my mom--no one else get any ideas) is THIS:

If you're wondering what that is, it's a diaper bag. The world's coolest diaper bag, to be specific. 

Don't believe me... check it out!

It's lined with water proof lining that can easily be hosed out or wiped down without damaging the bag. It also keeps rain out when you're trying to keep your diaper supply dry.

It comes with this super awesome folding change pad that is both stylish and functional. (Note the binky holder in the corner there. That's a neoprene pouch sized just for pacifiers.)

Unfolded you can see the two mesh pouches for holding clean diapers as well as the see through watertight pocket for dirty ones. The bright teal area is baby change land--also covered in a totally fluid resistant (yeah we won't pretend that's gonna be water) coating for easy clean up.

Change pad tucks away nicely and despite my inability to hold the bag open and take a picture at the same time, the bag is large and full of lots of useful pockets.

Timbuk2 makes amazing products, I have a few things made by them and they are all in mint condition despite being years old. I have a laptop bag of theirs that is 9 years old and still perfect. Not even a single zipper has broken. I looked into a lot of diaper bags and backpacks, and this one was the one I wanted most. I personally was not interested in any of the frilly designs on other bags, and I hate hand bags, or shoulder straps that can't be worn across the chest. Timbuk2 makes awesome messenger bags and this is basically a large messenger bag with a few adaptations specifically for diaper related issues. In the meantime it just looks awesome (in my opinion).  

Corey was skeptical at first, and I don't know if he would have gone for it if mom hadn't gone ahead and gotten it for us, but funnily enough on the day it arrived he met up with a friend on his way home who is a dad and whose opinion Corey holds pretty high. This dad friend mentioned that it was worth it to buy a diaper bag that rocked because you spend so much damned time with the thing. I think that sold Corey on it more than anything I could have said and when I showed it to him he seemed impressed. 

THANKS MOM!!! (And anonymous dad friend.)

So those are all my recent acquisitions. Let's see what else do you need to know?

Oh right. I had another midwife appointment this week. This time to actually have a real appointment instead of just meet the midwife and talk and get to know each other. It was lovely because we went over all of my files in detail in order to make sure she had everything and just to make sure I had all the details I wanted. What was particularly fabulous about this was that she took the time to go over my 20 week ultrasound results with me. Something my doctor (or rather the resident I meet with instead of my doctor) had flat out refused to do. Which I get, I mean it's time consuming to go over that kind of report and my results were all "normal" so I understand why she couldn't take the time. But, really this is a big part of why I wanted midwifery care to begin with. Being pregnant may not be medically a big deal, especially to people whose job it is to make sick people healthy again, but it's a big damned deal to me. I've never done it before and I like to know what's going on with my body, and I like to know all the details about how Speck is doing. So it was great to have my midwife go through all of the measurements the U/S tech had taken of Speck and show them to me on a measuring tape so I could get a great visual of just how big (or tiny) Speck is (or was 9 weeks ago). So cool! Also, at the time of the U/S I had normal amounts of amniotic fluid, a nicely closed cervix, and a posterior placenta that was not in any way blocking my cervix. All of which is good. Yay details!

The update from the latest appointment was that my fundal height was measuring right on time 28cm (I was 28 weeks and 3 days at my appointment). Funny thing; as my midwife was trying to measure where the top of my uterus was she exclaimed, twice, "you have very strong abs." Which just made me chuckle, because, yeah, I keep thinking that's why my bump is so small even though my fundal height is perfectly normal. Speck is measuring just fine, but my abs are keeping everything crammed in tight. Don't know if that's a good thing or not, but it's what I've got. 

Meanwhile my bp was still nice and low (the low side of normal that is) and Speck's heart rate was not only normal but on par with all previous heart rate measurements so far. Speck is consistent like that. 

*multi-hour time lapse*

Speck took me down for a two hour nap and by the time I woke up Corey was home and it was time to make dinner and take the dog for a walk. So, that all happened in between that last paragraph and this one. 

That's a thing. Speck is back to taking me down for naps even though I am generally feeling pretty energetic. However, I have noticed that I'm not up for all night hangs as I once was. We had guests over the weekend and we had plans to go out both Friday and Saturday night. I managed to stay out to somewhat respectable hours both nights, but on Friday night after a few hours of dancing I was exhausted and barely managed to stay awake until our 1am departure time. Meanwhile, on Saturday night a few hours of talking to new people wiped me out and I left the party at 11pm. 

The only new thing this week seems to be that Speck is moving a lot, and the movements can be pretty huge. I have had moments of being distracted from working on the laptop by seeing a shark circling out of the corner of my eye. That's no shark though, it's the protohuman inside of me doing barrel rolls again. I suppose this has been a slow build over weeks, but it seemed particularly marked this week. 

Alright, I think that covers this week. We're off for a long weekend in the northern part of the province and I will return to the land of interwebs late on Sunday. Hope everyone enjoys the long weekend. Here are two shots of the belly to hold you over til next week.

I added a forward facing one so you can check out my slowly darkening linea nigra. I think it's awesome. 

One of these days I'll get Corey to take a proper belly shot again, but at least we have these mirror selfies in the meantime. Happy Canada Day and Fourth of July everyone! (Or just a random weekend in July if you're not from the northern two countries in north america.)

Week 28

Well, I'm a day early I suppose, since today is technically the last day of week 28 and week 29 doesn't start 'til tomorrow, but honestly, it's close enough and this weekend is going to be packed with activities and guests coming from out of town and well, it just makes more sense to write and post today.

I guess I could go ahead and schedule this to post tomorrow, but I figure after all the late posts I've made in the past few weeks an early one is probably just the thing. So here you go.

Week 28 has been fairly eventful, at least on a relative scale.

I've already forgotten what we did on Saturday but I remember it was busy, and on Sunday we went out to Corey's parents' place for a father's day hang which was nice. At some point in there I bought some new preggo summer clothes. Most of what I bought is NOT maternity. I'm really working to avoid buying maternity stuff because a. it's expensive and b. I hate the idea of buying clothes that I am only going to wear short term. So, we rocked the thrift store shopping and I did buy two maternity tops for dressing up a bit, but otherwise I bought stretchy long tank tops that cover the bump and the top of my pants and will continue to fit when I regain my normal shape. I also bought a pair of spandex shorts to wear under dresses and prevent the dreaded thigh rub, as well as a running skirt that has built in spandex shorts for the same purpose. Everything is a bit larger than I would have purchased pre-pregnancy, but not a ton larger and all stretchy athletic stuff, so quite likely to still fit in the future. Yay! And it feels good to have more than one top that I can wear with my limited number of pants etc. I'm not much of a fashion person, but even I was getting frustrated being limited to two outfits on repeat every damned day.

I deleted facebook from my phone at some point in the last ten days (can't remember when exactly) and it has led to a huge boost in productivity. I now only go onto facebook on my computer and facebook on the computer is a lot more clunky and less inviting, so it's easy to ditch it and get back to whatever I was supposed to be doing in the first place. Also, the damned app takes up almost a half a gig off space on a phone, so clearing it out was a huge help to me being able to download important things... like The Room 3... (If you don't know what that is, but you like puzzle games and you have a smartphone or a tablet, start with The Room and work your way up from there. Thank me/curse me later. Hours of your life you will never get back, but you'll be happy to give them up if you love puzzles, amazing graphics and creepy storylines and soundtracks.) Ahem... anyway...

Pregnancy, right. That's what this blog is about.

Which reminds me, there are two big things I forgot to mention in my last post, but which are just as relevant this week as they were last week so I suppose it's ok that they got spread out anyway.

1. Pregnancy brain! I hadn't noticed much in the way of this during the first or early second trimesters, but over the past few weeks I have noticed it and it is weird. My vocabulary recall has plummeted. Words that I use all the time. Common simple words. Words that five and ten year olds use on a daily basis, have escaped me completely for minutes at a time. It's ridiculous. And it happens a few times a day. I mean don't get me wrong, I'm used to having little moments like this normally, but maybe once a week or so, maybe less. Not a FEW TIMES A DAY. Seriously. Words like "bike," "furniture," and "couch" are three examples that have already eluded me today. What the fuck, brain? Why are we doing this?

So yeah, that's fun.

2. THIGH RUB! Holy hell. My poor skin. Now, let's get one thing perfectly clear, my thighs always touch a bit. Even when I'm in damned good shape my thighs are not the kind that stay gracefully separated. I've come to terms with this. No problem. But why, oh why, are they now suddenly magnetized to one another and attempting to become one piece of flesh? And I'm only kind of joking there, because after all the skin has rubbed off from chaffing the damned things are just likely to heal as a single piece as the two they started off as. OW!

Today I pushed thigh rub to a new limit accidentally by going for a run. I was wearing my new running skirt and thought it would prevent the dreaded thigh rub, after all, the spandex shorts cover my thighs... but no. The thighs are so determined to join forces that they pushed shorts out of the way and made sweet sweet love to each other despite my best attempts to pull the shorts back into place and now... I have pepperoni thighs. Only without all the deliciousness of pepperoni.

But, serious plus side to all of this: I RAN TODAY!! Granted, it was for just under a mile in the middle of my dog walk, but it was running, and it felt good, and SPECK DIDN'T TRY TO USE MY BLADDER AS A LIFE PRESERVER!!! YAY!!!

So, I'm going to try to make a habit of that, even if I stick to just a mile or two and keep it super slow. It felt good to do more than just walk.

And in bigger news, yesterday was the day of getting all the things done. I took the car for maintenance and tire changing (we don't have extra rims so we can't change them ourselves at home) and I went to upgrade my phone (I always feel guilty about giving up on a phone that still works just fine, but I couldn't resist getting the newest Samsung phone (the S7) for FREE by trading in my old phone). AND I met with my new midwife.

Oh yeah. That's the big one.

We talked for over two hours. She's great. The birth center is freaking gorgeous and I am SUPER tempted to give birth there rather than the hospital and... yeah. Despite my doubts last week I totally decided to switch over my care. It feels really nice to have all of my concerns addressed and to feel like I'm not being rushed through everything. So, yep. Midwife. I've got one, and I'm very happy about it.

Let's see... anything else? Speck is moving a bunch these days and can now push hard enough that my whole stomach moves around visibly when s/he decides to do a barrel roll. (At least I assume that's what Speck is up to. Certainly, it's what I would do, if I were suspended in fluid and had nothing else to keep me busy.)

I think that about covers it. Here's a photo of Artemis enjoying the summer wonderland that is our typical afternoon walk:

And here's a mirror bumpie that I took today (Corey will take the proper bump pic tomorrow, but this is what we have to work with today). And just for variety's sake there are two, one with a shirt (one of the new ones I just got) and one without.

Week 27

It's officially summer (ok solstice says three more days, but whatever) and this is Artemis' and my favorite walk. Loving the green. Not loving the mosquitos, but they're not too bad yet.

Well here we are. Week 27 is done. Week 28 has started. Which means I am 27 weeks pregnant, starting my 7th month and officially into my third trimester... unless you're of the calendar that chooses a to accept the third trimester as starting at 28 weeks, in which case I might have another week to go, but I honestly don't care at this point. I'm going to call it the third trimester. Why not?

First up, some news and a dilemma (good news, good dilemma, nothing bad here): I received a call from the Women's Health center and there is an opening for a midwife that I can take if I want it. On the one hand that's super exciting because I REALLY wanted a midwife when this whole thing started. I wanted one for lots of reasons, not least of which was that I was terrified about how this whole thing would go, I didn't know the first thing about pregnancy, and I felt alone and unsupported (aside from my hubby--this was back in trimester one, when we weren't telling anyone and I felt very isolated) and the idea of having someone who would spend over an hour with me once a month going over everything that was happening to me sounded incredibly reassuring.

But when that didn't happen, I made do with what was available, did a ton of my own research, found a doula and a doctor who was down with natural childbirth and now... Now I don't know. I still love the idea of a midwife. I don't particularly enjoy the 15 minute sprint through the doctor's office that constitutes my monthly prenatal appointment (soon to be biweekly). However, I do like the doctor I found, and if he's actually the one who delivers me I think all will be well. I'm ok with the idea of a hospital birth as long as no one pushes interventions at me, and I think my doula is awesome and we're pretty prepared for this whole thing. Plus my doctor now would become Speck's pediatrician and that's pretty cool. So... do I really want to go through the hassle of switching healthcare providers at this point? I don't know... but, being one who is all for having the most information possible for any decision, I have made an appointment to meet with the midwife to see how awesome she is. Apparently I can do this without upsetting anyone and make my choice after we've met. Plus I'll get to see the birth center (which I have to say is another really appealing part of having a midwife, it looks SOOO comfortable and you get a private room and everything). So, lots of thinking to be done, and a good problem to have, really. I look forward to meeting the midwife and seeing how I feel about her. My hope is that Corey will be able to come too and he can throw in his two cents. We shall see...

Now then: Things that are new in the past week...

HOT FLASHES. Holy shit. I understand that hormones, and blood levels, are all surging and my body is working overtime to adapt to everything that's happening but DAMN. For someone who generally runs cold, and tends to wear fuzzy slippers and a hoodie while reading at night even through most of the summer, suddenly feeling an urge to strip down to as little as possible at 1am is disconcerting at best and downright freaky at worst. (Worst being the first time it happened and I freaked out wondering if I suddenly had a fever, or if the temperature in the house had suddenly spiked, or if I had caught fire without noticing it somehow...) Anyway, having never experienced a real hot flash before this was unsettling, and I immediately turned to the internet to make sure it was a pregnancy thing and not... I don't know... the plague? But yeah, we're all good. Super common in pregnancy especially during the third trimester. So yay! Not the plague! But BOO! COMMON in the third trimester. Blech. I could do without that.

Gas. Gas is not new. Gas has been a big part of this whole deal from the start but lately it's been... more prevalent, shall we say? I don't know. I've been gassy since the first week of pregnancy, but it's like now I can't get up and walk across the room without crop dusting the whole way. Also, apparently, quite common and due in large part to a slowing of my digestive system directly related to pregnancy. Great. Fun isn't it?

Fatigue! Also not new, but having made a more decisive return. While most of the second trimester was spent with only quick bouts of fatigue that were generally cured by napping, the past week and a half has swung back towards the all day fatigue that plagued me in the first trimester. Though, to be fair, it hasn't been quite as all consuming... or rather, it seems to be more of a physical fatigue and less of a mind, body and soul fatigue. I feel tired for no reason, as though I've just run ten miles or more (would that I still could) and sluggish, almost like one feels during a flu. Yet my brain still functions relatively well and I have maintained most of my motivation for writing and work in general. Most, but not all. It has taken a hit. But so far it's nothing compared to the all-I-can-do-is-curl-up-into-a-ball-and-question-all-my-life-choices fatigue of the first trimester. Small victories. We'll take 'em.

PANIC!! This one is pretty new. Not that I haven't had moments all through this pregnancy of disbelief/doubt about what's really happening here, but with Speck moving more and more I'm now constantly faced with the reality that there is a living human growing inside of me and that pretty soon (13 weeks from now) that human is going to come out and say hi, move into our house, and take over our lives. ACK!!! Unprepared doesn't begin to cover how I feel about that, but it's the best I can come up with on short notice. Still, there are other moments when it's pretty cool. Speck is in there, doing her/his thing and becoming a person. There is personality there already. Something I didn't realize until I had close friends have kids is that even new borns have personality. They don't do much with it. Mostly sleeping, crying, eating, and pooping, but it's there, and if you spend enough time with them you can tell. That's the part I'm looking forward to. Getting to know this little human we've made and learning things from it. Seeing the world anew through her/his eyes and sharing that sense of discovery. That part is going to be awesome (in the most literal sense of the word). Then there will be the crying, pooping, eating, and sleeping, but I guess we'll get through that too.

And, finally, DISCOMFORT. I won't pretend that's exactly new, because let's face it; this whole thing is essentially a nine month exercise in seeing just how uncomfortable you can be in your own skin, but the body is really ramping it up here in preparation for the final third. Finding a comfortable way to sit for a long time is pretty much impossible. I wake up every few hours in the middle of the night with various body parts aching, or my bladder flashing neon signs at me saying "EMPTY ME NOW, OR ELSE!" None of my clothes really fit anymore, and I need to buy new tops that cover the waistbands on my maternity pants... everything is a pain in the ass. From getting out of a chair, to trying to go for a long walk without having to pee half way through. Running is out, not because it's too much for my body, but because it's too much for my poor bladder. Five minutes in I feel like Speck has decided that we've entered rough seas and my bladder is her/his life saver. Speck clings to it like a wayward teddy bear and I slow to a walk because damn it, it's just not worth it. Turning in bed feels like turning an unruly boat with a broken rudder, and I am constantly, vibrantly aware of my bump and the fact that it often moves on its own.

So, yeah, people keep telling me I look great, and I know that as far as pregnancy goes I've been super lucky. And, furthermore, I feel pretty good most of the time. I don't want to give you the impression that I'm miserable. Far from it. I think I am lucky, and have had a pretty good run of this thing so far. But I guess that's my point. Even when your pregnancy is going super well, and you feel pretty good, and can still do lots of stuff, and everyone thinks you look wonderful... PREGNANCY IS STILL A PAIN IN THE ASS! So, if you know anyone who is pregnant, please be nice to them. And don't compare their pregnancy to your pregnancy, or your wife's, or your friends, or your brother's sister-in-law's third cousin's. Every pregnancy is different and they all have their sucky moments. So hugs all around for the pregnant ladies, for keeping the species going and putting up with all the parts of this that are bullshit. Not far now, ladies. Just one hot, sweaty, sticky summer to go. ;-)

Here's the weekly bump picture! It was pretty hot yesterday so I'm not wearing much. Those are prepreggo jean shorts that I was amazed to find still fit (with a hair tie buttonhole extension of course)!